daisyrosario

50 years ago, America’s biggest employer was General Motors, where workers made the modern equivalent of $50 dollars an hour. Today, America’s biggest employer is Walmart, where the average wage is $8 dollars an hour. Which means you can share a room in a transient hotel with a drifter who cuts his toenails with a machete.

And Walmart released their annual report this month, and in it was the fact that most of what Walmart sells is food. And most of their customers need food stamps to pay for it. Meanwhile, Walmart’s owners are so absurdly rich that one of them, Alice Walton, spent over a billion dollars building an art museum in Bentonville, Arkansas, 500 miles away from the nearest person who ever would want to look at art.

And she said about it, “For years I’ve been thinking about what we can do as a family that can really make a difference.” How about giving your employees a raise, you deluded nitwit?

Take the case of Belle Knox. She’s the Duke University freshman who was recently outed as a porn star. But she doesn’t have the typical porn star biography… No, she’s a level-headed articulate 18-year-old majoring in women’s studies.

So people are saying, why the porn? Because Duke costs $61 grand a year! Since 1980, college tuition has increased 600% above the inflation rate. I’m surprised they’re not all doing porn. …

This is what the Paul Ryans of the world don’t understand — that this is not a country of lazy people and good people, so much as it is a country of rich people and desperate people.

Do you know how much Americans owe in student loans?
$1.3 trillion dollars.

We’re going to have to sell a lot of ass to pay that tab.

Bill Maher on the vanishing middle class (via kateoplis)

Truth.

(via 56goldfish)

Maher can be strange but he can also be right on the money. 

(via daisyrosario)

funnyordie

funnyordie:

Sociopathdating.com

Are you a manipulative egomaniac with no capacity for real human emotion, and are looking for someone just like you? You’re in luck.

Thanks for the plug, FoD!

Here are the credits:

Written & Directed by Michael Busch

Starring Whit Thomas, Katie Cunningham, Jarrett Grode, Angela Trimbur, Timm Sharp, Stephanie Allynne & Wendy McColm

DP Carissa Dorson
Sound Will Bohland
Editor Clay Tatum

thecomedybureau

Shopping From Home Off Your TV Is More Fun When Asking “Can You Put It Up Your Butt?”

thecomedybureau:

Michael Busch, JC Coccoli, and Nacho Punch brings what should be a version of QVC or HSN where all the products are being-stuck-up-your-butt-friendly.

As juvenile as the idea may sound to you, it is undoubtedly way better and funnier than talking about thread count for 15 minutes on live TV. Watch it here.

mattdwyer

jamesurbaniak:

Years ago, sometime in the late ’90s, I auditioned for a one-act play in NY. It was a light comedy about a playwright who had a troll who lived in his closet who wrote his plays for him. My audition for the role of the the troll went very well. I thought the character suited my strengths; I took…

themanifestoshow
themanifestoshow:

The Manifesto Show w/ Casey & Jo Jo Present Fran Gillespie and Podprov
First half — 8pmGood Clean RichardsCrusin’ USAPrincess CakeTeam Lottery Slot with guest improvisers Casey Feigh & Jacob Womack - Bring one or more friends and throw your team name in the hat at the top of the hour for the chance to play!!!— Break —Second half — 9:15pmBat Dad FrenemiesCasey & Jo Jo Present: Fran GillespiePodprov— Break —10:30pmJam!We are located at:The Clubhouse [theclubhouseimprov.com]1107 N El Centro AveLos Angeles, CA 90038Remember, there’s a TEAM LOTTERY AND a JAM every night, so everyone in the audience will have a chance to play.We are improv for the people so admission is free, but we urge performers and audience alike to throw a few rubles in the donation bucket. There will also be beer and water available with donation.— Team Info —Good Clean Richards: Raleigh Jones, Barbara Heller, Zack Galovan, Tommy Gerhardt, Jaunita Chase, Ayden Mayeri, Peter Stoia, Conor Gilligan, Thomas Hamilton, Ashley MartinCrusin’ USA: Jack Allison, Michael Busch, Zack Pearlman Princess Cake: Mike Critelli, Zach Fairless, Nick Luciano, Alex Nelson, Joe WeberTeam Lottery Slot: Bring your full team or friends and throw your team name in the hat at the top of the hour for the chance to play!!!Bat Dad: Nina Concepcion, Katie Cunningham, Chase McCown, AJ Salas, Matt Stauter, Sarah Stoecker Frenemies: Josh Duvendeck, Hesley Harpes, Greg Perry, Matt Bohrer, Daniel Acker, Jessica JacobsCasey & Jo Jo Presents Fran Gillespie: Casey Feigh, Joe Hartzler, Josh Simpson & Fran Gillespie Podprov: Alex Berg, Casey Feigh, Danny Masterangelo, Jacob Womack, Jen Krueger, Jon Mackey, Nicholas Mandernach

Cruisin’ USA tonight! Come cruisin’ with Jack Allison, Zack Pearlman and me!

themanifestoshow:

The Manifesto Show w/ Casey & Jo Jo Present Fran Gillespie and Podprov

First half — 8pm

Good Clean Richards

Crusin’ USA

Princess Cake

Team Lottery Slot with guest improvisers Casey Feigh & Jacob Womack - Bring one or more friends and throw your team name in the hat at the top of the hour for the chance to play!!!

— Break —

Second half — 9:15pm

Bat Dad 

Frenemies

Casey & Jo Jo Present: Fran Gillespie

Podprov

— Break —

10:30pm

Jam!

We are located at:

The Clubhouse [theclubhouseimprov.com]
1107 N El Centro Ave
Los Angeles, CA 90038

Remember, there’s a TEAM LOTTERY AND a JAM every night, so everyone in the audience will have a chance to play.

We are improv for the people so admission is free, but we urge performers and audience alike to throw a few rubles in the donation bucket. There will also be beer and water available with donation.

— Team Info —

Good Clean Richards: Raleigh Jones, Barbara Heller, Zack Galovan, Tommy Gerhardt, Jaunita Chase, Ayden Mayeri, Peter Stoia, Conor Gilligan, Thomas Hamilton, Ashley Martin

Crusin’ USA: Jack Allison, Michael Busch, Zack Pearlman 

Princess Cake: Mike Critelli, Zach Fairless, Nick Luciano, Alex Nelson, Joe Weber

Team Lottery Slot: Bring your full team or friends and throw your team name in the hat at the top of the hour for the chance to play!!!

Bat Dad: Nina Concepcion, Katie Cunningham, Chase McCown, AJ Salas, Matt Stauter, Sarah Stoecker 

Frenemies: Josh Duvendeck, Hesley Harpes, Greg Perry, Matt Bohrer, Daniel Acker, Jessica Jacobs

Casey & Jo Jo Presents Fran Gillespie: Casey Feigh, Joe Hartzler, Josh Simpson & Fran Gillespie 

Podprov: Alex Berg, Casey Feigh, Danny Masterangelo, Jacob Womack, Jen Krueger, Jon Mackey, Nicholas Mandernach

Cruisin’ USA tonight! Come cruisin’ with Jack Allison, Zack Pearlman and me!

cracked
cracked:

"I’m the main character, right?" — Stephen Baldwin, inexplicably
6 Actors Who Thought They Had Made a Totally Different Movie

#5. The Usual Suspects — Everyone Thought They Were Keyser Soze
Verbal Kint’s story is so convincing that Gabriel Byrne, the actor who played Dean Keaton, really believed he was Keyser Soze. He went right on believing he was Keyser Soze all through the filming of The Usual Suspects and wasn’t aware of the twist until he and the rest of the cast were shown a preview screening, at which point he became furiously pissed and dragged director Bryan Singer outside to scream into his face about it. … In fact, according to Kevin Spacey (who played Verbal Kint), Singer had convinced everyone in the main cast that they were Keyser Soze.

Read More

cracked:

"I’m the main character, right?" — Stephen Baldwin, inexplicably

6 Actors Who Thought They Had Made a Totally Different Movie

#5. The Usual Suspects — Everyone Thought They Were Keyser Soze

Verbal Kint’s story is so convincing that Gabriel Byrne, the actor who played Dean Keaton, really believed he was Keyser Soze. He went right on believing he was Keyser Soze all through the filming of The Usual Suspects and wasn’t aware of the twist until he and the rest of the cast were shown a preview screening, at which point he became furiously pissed and dragged director Bryan Singer outside to scream into his face about it. … In fact, according to Kevin Spacey (who played Verbal Kint), Singer had convinced everyone in the main cast that they were Keyser Soze.

Read More

jamespumphrey
jamespumphrey:

Making this movie was the hardest and most fun thing I’ve done as an actor. We spent two months in Branson, Missouri and went back a few times for reshoots. That place is weird, like a christian Las Vegas.  After two years, I’m excited that people can finally see it. Rent it on iTunes or if you live in a cool city it might be playing in a theatre there. Awesome. 
Click the poster to watch the trailer. 

jamespumphrey:

Making this movie was the hardest and most fun thing I’ve done as an actor. We spent two months in Branson, Missouri and went back a few times for reshoots. That place is weird, like a christian Las Vegas.  After two years, I’m excited that people can finally see it. Rent it on iTunes or if you live in a cool city it might be playing in a theatre there. Awesome. 

Click the poster to watch the trailer. 

thecomedybureau

Pat Healy Does David Koechner’s Bidding in Trailer for Cheap Thrills

thecomedybureau:

As far as dark indie comedies go, you might be hard pressed to be more on board for something next year outside of Cheap Thrills starring Pat Healy, David Koechner, Ethan Embry, and Sara Paxton

Just watch a red band trailer of Koechner putting Healy and Embry up to whatever he wishes for money and all hell breaking loose.

Because you probably want to know now, Cheap Thrills comes out Spring 2014.